The Prophet Muhammad (Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) was sad.  He had recently had a baby, a son, but that baby died.  One day he was sitting with his friends and he fell asleep.  When he woke up, he was smiling.  His friends asked him why he was so happy.  He (S) said that Allah had given him a present, and that made him so happy.  Can you guess what it was? (Then I recite surah Kawther).  Allah gave him a river in Jannah!  Do you know what color that river was?!  It was white like milk.  Do you know what it tasted like?  It didn’t taste like water, like our rivers.  This one tastes sweeter than honey!  Who wants to taste Al Kawther!?  Al Kawther has a lot of cups to drink from it, do you know how may cups?  As many as the number of stars in the sky.  That’s a lot of cups!  And there’s pearls along the river.  They’re empty, and you can go inside them, like a tent!

Today, we took the story one step further.  I brought out some ‘fake’ pearls, some honey to taste, and some milk.  As we went through the story, we played with these items, tasted them, etc.  Then we made chalk drawings of Al Kawther.

This is one of those days we’ve watched an embarrassing amount of tv.. And it’s barely past noon!  Nevertheless, here’s a pic from our lazy day..

I was too tired to sit with the kids for a project, so I asked them to choose a color word from the word wall, and draw something that color. Two minutes later I returned to see them, project abandoned, watching the rain. I'm sure there's some learning happening in that, I'm just too tired to think about it!

As I sit here, it occurs to me that I have not done nearly enough to teach them about this incredible man, this noble prophet, our beloved Prophet Muhammad (Sallallahu alaihi wa salam).

So what can I tell them about?  Here’s some notes I’ve compiled that I think illustrate who he was in a way my three year olds can understand:

1. He (S) was a special person who Allah created and Allah loved him very much.  Allah loved him so much he blessed him with many special gifts.  Just like how Mama loves you, and let’s you do ‘special’ things (like painting, or —) Allah let Prophet Muhammad (S) do special things as well.
2. He (S) split the moon into two pieces because Allah let him [Sahih al-Bukhari, Volume 6, Book 60, Number 388:  Narrated Abdullah:  The moon was cleft asunder while we were in the company of the Prophet, and it became two parts. The Prophet said, Witness, witness (this miracle)."
3. Once there had been no rain for a looong time and the people were really worried.  They needed rain for their plants to grow, so they could have food.  So they went to the Prophet (S) and he made dua to Allah.  He asked Allah to send down rain, and Allah answered his dua.  When Allah loves somebody, He (SWT) answers their du’a to Him.  So the rain started coming down for many days.  It rained sooo much, that the people got worried again!  Now there was TOO much rain!  So they went back to the Prophet (S) and asked him to make du’a again to Allah, this time asking for the rain to stop.  Allah (SWT) answered the Prophet’s (S) dua again, and the rain stopped.  [Sahih al-Bukhari,  Volume 8, Book 73, Number 115:  Narrated Anas:  A man came to the Prophet on a Friday while he (the Prophet) was delivering a sermon at Medina, and said, "There is lack of rain, so please invoke your Lord to bless us with the rain." The Prophet looked at the sky when no cloud could be detected. Then he invoked Allah for rain. Clouds started gathering together and it rained till the Medina valleys started flowing with water. It continued raining till the next Friday. Then that man (or some other man) stood up while the Prophet was delivering the Friday sermon, and said, "We are drowned; Please invoke your Lord to withhold it (rain) from us" The Prophet smiled and said twice or thrice, "O Allah! Please let it rain round about us and not upon us." The clouds started dispersing over Medina to the right and to the left, and it rained round about Medina and not upon Medina. Allah showed them (the people) the miracle of His Prophet and His response to his invocation.

One day I sent my husband a text.. I can’t remember the content, but I remember being surprise to read his response to it.  He had assumed that I was annoyed when I had written it, although I wasn’t.  I went back to check my message and I was SURE I had written it in a neutral tone.  My husband had read into my words, and projected annoyance on my part.

Hmm… this really made me think…

There’s a rule called the 10-80-10 rule.  10 percent will always represent the negative minority, 10 percent will always represent the positive minority, and the masses represent the remaining 80 percent.  What does that mean?  In life, it may mean that  10% will always love you no matter what you do, 10% will always hate you.. so don’t pay too much attention to the folks on the two extremes.  Instead, focus on the remaining 80%, for they represent the truth.

I started to think about my marriage in these terms.  10% of the time is negative.. where both parties are engulfed in a fight.  10% is positive, where you can be on cloud nine.  But the majority of the time, the 80%, is spent in the middle.  I feel like sometimes people focus too much on the bottom 10%, when that’s not a real reflection of the marriage.  (I dunno anybody who focuses solely on that top 10% time, but let me know if you find some one who does!)  Women, especially, tend to do this saying things like, “You always,” or “You never,” when really, that ‘bad time’ just represents about 10% of your marriage.

The truth is, I think what happens during that remaining 80% is what tells us the truth about our marriage..

Going back to my story.  I had sent a text to my husband during that 80 percent time… At a time when I was neutral.. I was in the middle.. I wasn’t really lovey dovey, but by no means was I upset.  And yet, so easily it was misconstrued and taken down to the bottom 10%.

So I decided to try something.  What if I said a kind word to my husband EVERY time I texted him or emailed him and I was in the ‘eighty’… Not angry, not overly affection… I was just in the middle…  What if I did that, as an insurance.. to ensure that my 80 percent stayed good.. or even better, got bumped up to the top 10 percent.

I took it a step further to make it even easier.  What if that one word was a nickname for him?  Most of us have affectionate nicknames for our spouse.  I decided to address my husband with a nickname every single time I texted him or emailed him.

The results were shocking… It took our middle.. our 80 percent time.. and ‘bumped it up a notch’.  He started replying to me positively as well, without realizing it… He was more attentive at home.. He was helping more with the kids… It was unbelievable to me how one action.. putting some positivity into our conversation, could change so much.

Don’t get me wrong, we still argue.. daily… I mean, the bottom 10% of our time still exists… we still have a negative side to our marriage… And to be honest, it didn’t really change our top 10% either.  But for the majority of our time… for our 80 percent.. things are so much sweeter..

So try it… And let me know what happens!

Here’s a peek inside our home where it all happens:

The truth is, with homeschooling, sometimes you’re going to be a hit, and sometimes, a total miss.  Learning to go with the flow is a challenge.  I spent some time trying to get my kids to love an activity with tangrams.  They LOVE tangrams.. and I wanted to try exploring making our own pictures today.  But they were not very inspired.. and they quickly got tired of using the picture cards also, even though they’ve loved doing that before.

So my alternate activity was a box of matching flashcards some one had given us.  Usually, they’re big flashcard game fans… Today, not so much.  FAIL.

I kept my cool and decided to just let them go early since they weren’t feeling any projects today, when Mac announced he wanted to play school with our ‘free draw wall’… Twenty minutes later he and Cheese are playing ‘school’ on their own…

.. deep breath in, deep breath out… letting them initiate their own activities and learning sounds wonderful.. but in order to get there I’m learning that I need to start letting go of the reins… I need to stop trying to control…

People ask me all the time, “How do I know what my child needs to know?”  For preschoolers, they don’t really need to know that much.  But, in the area of math, if you’re looking for activities to do with your child, try picking some that develop his/her ‘number sense’.

What IS number sense?

Number sense is a basic understanding of HOW numbers work, how they relate to one another, how they can be manipulated, etc.  For example, two kids, that are 4 or 5 years old, count to 15.  They both use base ten blocks (google it if you’ve never seen these).  One uses the ‘ones’ and counts out 15.  The other knows that 15 can be represented by 15 ‘ones’, OR one ‘ten’ and five ‘ones’.

In this situation, the latter has greater number sense.  While your child doesn’t really need to know that much before he enters kindergarten, you can still help him develop a better sense of numbers.

Activities to help your child develop number sense

Today I decided to make some 'homemade' writing trays using some uncooked rice. Originally I thought these kid sized shoe box lids would be a good substitute for the real trays.

Eventually I decided to move on to paper plates, as the kids really needed a bigger surface area to draw letters. Can't tell what letters they're making exactly? No worries.. The point of the activity is more in the physical experience of touching the rice in the shape of the letters than it is about visually looking at the completed letters. Most kids learn best by 'doing' (over seeing and hearing)... Activities like this allow them to internalize how the letters are written through touch.

We ended with a little activity where I held up a letter card, and they proceeded to write the letters (both upper and lower case) with a marker... I would sometimes show them how to draw the letters by moving my finger over the card as if my finger were a pen. Sometimes they asked me to write it down and show them that way.. There were no rules..